Strange things are afoot at the CircleK

Chapter one: In which I meet some interesting people, elbow a vampire in the face and shoot him twice.

Dad's fund raiser was going very well. I met an entirely sexy security guard dressed as Wonder Woman who I am pretty sure would kick my arse all over the bedroom (and I would no doubt enjoy it greatly). She blew me off with the usual "I hate rich people" thing (like I have a choice) so for fun I played it off that she was a man hating dyke and then met a saucy kitten in a Cat Woman with a very nice bottom and plenty of spark when an armed group came in to steal everyone's swag.

I managed to get the leader away from Dad and into another room. Cat Woman was in there, arse in the air (Ding Dong!) and I managed to use her as a distraction to try and lay the goon out... only he was made of solid steel. Despite connecting really well he shook it off and was away and behind a table before I blinked. Cat woman opened up on the man, much to my surprise as I was in her line of fire, but I have to admit she was a very competent shot and I think she hit him as I was lining up my own sights.

I offered him a .45 round to the body which would normally drop a man like a sack of potatoes, but he barely even noticed it and only looked hurt when I hit him again as he tried to escape. Then a Swat team came in and took out the crooks in entirety. When I say in entirety I mean it in a literal sense with the man I shot... they opened up on him SAS Iranian Embassy hostage rescue style and I swear to God he disintegrated... ACTUALLY TURNED TO DUST.

Once the scene was cleared and I made sure Dad was safe and on his way home in the limo I went home myself and did a little research online. I looked up what I saw and everything kept pointing to Bram Stoker's Dracula. Load of old bollocks, thought I. I bought the book and read it anyway, just in case and when I was about two thirds of the way through my phone sent me a video message showing the Swat incursion and the man turning to dust. Attached was an address and appointment to a clandestine meeting which I decided to go to, but not prepared for a fight.

I passed the ever so saucy Wonder Woman on the way and she gave me more shit when I offered her a lift, figuring that as she was there she was sent an invite too. She gave me more shit, flat out refused a lift so I went on my way and pulled up to the address in short order. The house is actually a Mansion and is very well kept too. The door was open but I knocked and waited for someone to answer. Someone in the window I recognised from the fund raiser waved me in so I proceeded inside. Diamonds were everywhere. Lavish doesn't come close to describing it.

My car alarm went off and Wonder Woman was outside. I went out and the was a very fresh dink by the rear driver's side wheel arch... shouldn't take too long to repair. I took it as a sign of stilted flirting from Wonder Woman and just let it go. Hopefully she'll be a little less... physical with her rutting and just admit she at least likes me sooner or later.

Anyways, we go back in side and a few others from the fund raiser were there. Cat Woman, whose name turns out to be Paige, a chemistry teacher called Anthony (a handsome, upstanding man of colour) and the young raven haired girl Dad hired to read tarot cards named Nadia. Genevive, a prospective campaign donor was there, too. Nice looking lady, great figure. Shame she's French or Canadian or whatever. Can't win 'em all.

The leader, or at least whom I presume to be such, of the people in the mansion informed us that what we saw was indeed a vampire... Load of old bollocks I thought again. He went on to explain that were more bad things out there than just vampires and they are all very, very real. One of Marcus' flunkies, a cute girl who seems permanently attached to a phone or laptop who went the the handle Mouse, said that for every 50's B-movie monster archetype there are probably more real life things, beings monsters out there still yet to be found. More bollocks pileage thought I.

But I went along with what was said and heard them out. There was an offer of pay so I took them up on it and on that billion to one shot that they were right? I would help Dad in the process. He asked us to return the following evening. Offered Wonder Woman -aka Chloe - a lift home, got laughed at so I went back and offered her a lift home. She obliged and I did just that. Even though she is a very pretty redhead with an electric body(My word!) she doesn't seem to fit my bill and has a liking for Lionel Richie's handsomer nephew. Bloody good luck to him, I say.

I rose at normal time, went to the bookstore and picked up Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, following something Marcus said about her knowing what she was talking about. I then went to Best buy and picked up a few 1950's B-movie collections so I could bone up on the new subject. I watched one as I was doing my morning work out. Cheesy, but fun.

Got to the Mansion ten before due time (Dad says one has to remain good and punctual when humanly possible... humanly possible, that might have a new meaning now). I received more flack for my money and van. I couldn't work out if it was a jibe about me wanking in the back or shagging celebrities and also more jibes about coming from money and not earning it. I found said conclusion hopping to be in poor taste when it would appear that all of the women have no issue laughing at the hands that feed them whilst laughing at their faces (and probably behind their backs). I know better than to judge a book by it's cover, but my pride was barbed. It is was it and in time I am sure perception of them will change as their perception of me does.

Our task was to go to Moth Park and investigate some strange reported occurrences. Marcus thought there may be a ghost there. The very thought that ghosts are a real thing and not just a piece of mythical fancy was rather un-nerving, but I kept such feelings hidden as I didn't want my carefree demeanour to be tarnished. We gathered the documentation after reading up on the history of the park and what we could expect then loaded up in Heart Breaker and we set off. Traffic was bad and we were held up by about ten minutes, which gave more call for abuse but we arrived in one piece.

Chapter two: In which I play Cherche la Femme with the deceased and learn that phones are cameras, camcorders and laptops.

It was dark when we got to the park. The sky was still eerily overcast as it had been on and off for the last few days. It was more like Dartmoor weather, not Chicago.

We explored the park and came across some curious and disturbing things. firstly I saw a lady seemingly disappear on me. She was older, maybe mid forties, and she held a half opened, maybe half closed umbrella. There was nothing odd about her until we passed a big tree and she vanished. I tried to remember all I could about her, but she was fairly unremarkable up until the point she became fascinating but by then it was too late.

Anthony, bizarrely yet adamantly brandishing a fire poker, inspected the tree and saw one of the branches was utterly barren. On the trunk was a lover's heart with HC + FH inscribed therein. After finding out that my phone is in fact a computer Paige used it to search the internet and we found out that Thomas Hoth's wife was Felicity (FH) and the Hoth's gardener was a man called Henry Creed (no relation to Apollo). We made some conclusions along the lines of Lady Chatterly's Lover, but could not determine any truths.

After the arboretum we made our way to a demolished doll factory that was on the grounds and has yet to have been cleared to any semblance of satisfaction. We walks the grounds which were very muddy and had doll parts protruding at every angle... heads, arms, legs and bodies. It was disturbing to say the least, almost nauseating. I reined in my discomfort and braved a stiff upper lip in contrast to Anthony who seemed to wear his on his sleeve and Chloe who seemed to over compensate in the other direction. Paige made comment on my jumper, saying it was last year's and dated... whilst being right about the design, little did she know that last season's Armani is considered to be better than this year's crop and still with the times. I declined to mention this to save her face in matters style. And she calls her self an interior designer.

We pressed on toward a playground and Nadia saw the lady again by a roundabout that was moving soundlessly by its own accord. She disappeared and the roundabout came to a stop. When we moved the roundabout it squeaked plaintively and was in clear need of some oil and attention. Things were taking a turn for things unwanted. I don't want to live in a world where ghosts are real and vampires too... Perish the very thought, but that's where events were taking us. We also found a tea cup, clean and unused, upturned on the ground. I lifted the cup and frog hopped out from its unfair imprisonment. I still have no idea on the bearing or relevance of this to the Gardner, Mrs Hoth or the vanishing lady.

Our inspection of a statue of a beheaded Thomas Hoth showed wear on the neck and so the missing head could not have been related to the recent occurrences. Similarly nothing curious was found at the bandstand, though Paige did find a six fingered glove somewhere behind it.

A copse between the stage and the Manor house yielded a yellow dog collar with the name Richard on it... curious name for a dog. We declined on entering the Manor house as it was under renovation and Chloe was too scared to go in, citing the fact that if we entered it the place would likely collapse. Both Anthony and I scoffed at the very thought, but we didn't pres the matter. As we were leaving someone saw something on an up-turned wheelbarrow that turned out to be a CD of some description. We headed back to Heart breaker and popped it in the DVD player, but no video or audio came up, so we put it in my laptop and Anthony found it was a text file that said sleep over and over 4376 times! we decided that we had found plenty of evidence and that we mostly thought it was more than just people being people, considering the double sighting of the vanishing lady.

I dropped Paige off after we returned to the mansion and delivered our findings. I got home, picked up Frankenstein and started reading it a little more seriously. When I woke up I had the news on o check my stocks ad the weather forecast... who turns up but our vanishing lady. Her name was Lorena White and she had been dead four days. It was official. My life... our lives had been turned upside down in a matter minutes. I needed to think and finished my work out, showered, got dressed and went for a drive in Nancy... only when I got to the car wet tree leaves were scattered all over the seats. I checked that car was locked and the alarm hadn't been triggered. when I looked back inside the leaves were gone. I do not think I was hallucinating, so instead of taking her out for a relaxing drive I headed with haste to the Mansion.

Chapter three: In which I fail to have a panic attack.

It's a funny thing to admit that any event should probably see you peeing your pants and hyperventilating. I consider myself to be somewhat brave, probably more foolhardy, but soon-to-be-unfolded-events should be enough to make Conan reconsider picking up his sword in favour of running for the hills in a freshly soiled loin cloth. Now I'm not referring to the realities of a man sticking a gun barrel up a nostril as he impolitely requests a financial donation from your back pocket, no. I'm thinking more of the kind of things that defy explanation. The kind of things that provoke things that go bump in the night to hide under the covers.

Upon my return to the mansion I quickly saw I wasn't alone in my return. All but one of us had strange or un-nerving events happen after our visit to the park. By comparison I think my own experience was a little muted. Wonder Woman appeared to get through the night free of trouble and Cat Woman appeared to get the short end of the stick. Anthony and Nadia were yet to arrive, but according to Cat Woman, Anthony had a bad show of it in his car. Marcus stitched the events together and concluded it was message from Lenore. Poor girl got caught in something. Wrong place, wrong time. I don't believe for one second that any of us walking this earth are true innocents, not even nuns or Buddhist monks, but I equally believe that people like Lenore are receiving the rawest of deals when they die in a park and no one can explain it. None of us think it's a jilted lover or serial killer who is to blame for her passing... well, not a living breathing version of those two options in any case.

We returned to Moth Park to continue investigating after everyone was back.

Our investigating feet found policemen, many many policemen. Lenore had indeed been found not far from where we had been investigating previously. I now figure the leaves on my seat was Lenore's way of trying to tell me where she was hidden. The bare thought makes my heart sink that not only did I fail find her earlier, but also failed to understand that the vision in Nancy was a message; a plea for help.

We decided to take a look at the Park's house. Wonder Woman seemed to feel a little more secure that it was daylight... and also that we promised not to go inside. An indigent, in need of a good hot shower and equally hot meal, was outside and I offered him small reward for information of odd occurrences at the park in recent times. His reaction was curious. After babbling for a bit he took us to -that- tree. He pointed out the birds in it; eleven Blackbirds to be precise. He said that there were twelve there before Lenore bit the dust and also that the killer would show itself tonight when darkness fell. I am sure he said more, but Cat Woman said she saw faces in the bark and that's when my brain decided to go on a little holiday. I still can neither fathom nor make practical sense of what has been happening or what the consequences mean. Vampires is one thing, killer trees is another. So the realisation that crazy shit on a supernatural level is much more common that I was ever ready to admit hit me slap bang in the chops and it was precisely here that I should have had a panic attack. fortunately for my street cred and the cleanliness of my new chinos it wasn't to be.

Soon thereafter we headed back to the mansion to await the return of Anthony and Nadia. I did a little research in the library and lucked out onto a passage about tree spirits. Apparently malevolent arboreal beings do exist. It reminded me of a very cheesy 80's horror by the name of the Guardian that involved a tree that ate people. I admit I only remember it because of the egregious amount of bared 80's skin that seems to accompany these movies, but we decided to watch it anyway. Turns out it wasn't particularly useful, but there was boobage and no one was disappointed for the accidentally humourous distraction.

Chapter four: In which a painting invokes religious feelings.

We traveled to the summer home of the Moths. The place was run down and in dire need of professional attention. Therein resided Everett Moth, an old and tired man. Anthony, Cat Woman and Nadia did most of the talking as I spent most of my time trying to dismiss the odour of old people and dust. I perused a few newspaper clippings of the Moth affairs that revolved around the now famous Murder Tree.

Thomas Moth found out about Felicity's (his wife) infidelity with the help, Henry Creed, and that their children were in fact a product of that very long term infidelity. I can sympathise but his reaction was a little over board. He shot and killed Felicity and the children then made Creed the perfect patsy. They (no idea who 'they' really are) had Creed hanged by the now infamous Murder Tree and that's how it all began.

We thanked Mr Moth for his time then left. We were heading back to the van when Lenore appeared by a field and started walking into it. Against our better nature we followed and her direction lead us to a drainage well. It was very deep, twenty or more yards so I reckon. I volunteered to go down the rusted ladder, no idea why, guess it was just my turn. The bottom was a mess of dried mulch and root systems. I found a family